First... you should READ THIS ARTICLE
I've written about this before. This kinda made me almost cry. Like... a tear started to form. It does touch a chord in most of us mom's.
It is so very true. It is so very very important.
Almost all of the photos I have with my kiddos, I've taken at arm's length b/c sometimes I'd like for them to see that I did exist, should they ever forget.
Beyond the photographic ramifications of this post, it's also important to remember all those little things that we tend to forget. She may well not know exactly how much she hit home by reminding me, and I'm sure many others, that all those little things we do are so very important.
I spend every single waking moment consumed by what I need to do for them, what I should've done for them, what I want to do for them, what I can do for them, what I won't do for them... so on so forth.
Those are the things, the "things I do WELL" things, that we have to remember as parents. Not even JUST Moms. We get so caught up in all we don't do well enough, if you know me you this is too often my personal mantra, but we MUST make sure WE ourselves acknowledge all the great things that we do and focus on those.
Man... Dr. Smoot would be proud of that statement. ;) It's something I continually forget. It's something I continually have to remind myself and something he had to drill into my head for 2 years. THIS IS IMPORTANT PEOPLE!!!!!
More important than that, it's important that our families see, realize whatever all THOSE things. Instead of them constantly being disappointed in all the OTHER things we didn't get to or provide for them.
On that note, thanks to this article which I've seen floating around but not read yet, I will feel better about myself as a parent today b/c...
They've got Halloween oreo yogurt in the fridge with fresh bananas for snack after school. They've got shelves LOADED with good books. They've got arms that will hug them tight.
Their beds are currently occupied by Ralph, Bob, Sue, Max, Crocker, Ruff, and... yeah whatever the rest of their names are. I let them talk my ear off even when I wish for silence. I let them survive through using all my bath and hair products for "science experiments". I go w/out facial waxes, pedicures and nights out with the girls so that I can make sure they have movie night with the family and nice clothes and shoes.
I don't beat them, I don't call them names, I don't dump them off on unsuspecting friends and relatives to 'maybe' return later... eventually. I try my hardest to be there for them. I try to teach them good manners, values, common sense and... responsibility. We're working on that last one there. ;)
I can beat myself up better than anyone ever tried, so the moments when it dawns on me that... ya know? I'm actually a pretty decent mom, I feel such immense relief. It only comes along once in awhile, but those days when I realize that I'm not actually horrible at this. I'm simply human and flawlessly imperfect and they love me for it anyway... I feel pretty good.
Hopefully, as time goes on, I'll start to realize that more and more. It's a long road to get there and I remind myself that the people that appear to have it all together and wear a super mom cape under their neatly tailored clothing have nannies and maids or are so drugged up it's probably illegal in a few states.
The fact that I try, the fact that I fail, but I try again and never ever ever EVER give up for them matters more than anything else probably ever can. They probably won't see that for many years to come, but I'll just hold on to the hope that someday they will know that I might have failed at a lot of things, but trying to be the best Mom I could to them won't be one of them.
Where I am not cut out for being the class Mom and the thought of being surrounded by masses of short people with snot, germs, and screechy annoying noises is enough to send me out of state. I am the Mom that lets them dig giant mud tunnels and get covered from head to toe, takes them on photo scavenger hunts in the woods and builds forts out of whatever we can find. Takes them biking through the hills, makes them listen to nature, look at the stars, and helps maintain a pretty intense bug collection.
I accept them for the amazing beings they are. Just like I am supposed to and as time goes on, I learn that I am to expect the same from them and that they already DO accept me as I am. They love me, I am their Mommy. I might be a little too squishy and uncomfortable in my own skin,they could care less.
My lips kiss them goodnight, my arms hug the security right back into them when the world is just a little too much and my chest pillows their heads when they just need to hear the beating sound that lulled them through the very beginning of their existence, reminding them it will always be there for them no matter what.
(P.S. the title, if you don't understand the first part, you have not seen Bedtime Stories and you probably should b/c I think it's cute).
I've written about this before. This kinda made me almost cry. Like... a tear started to form. It does touch a chord in most of us mom's.
It is so very true. It is so very very important.
Almost all of the photos I have with my kiddos, I've taken at arm's length b/c sometimes I'd like for them to see that I did exist, should they ever forget.
Beyond the photographic ramifications of this post, it's also important to remember all those little things that we tend to forget. She may well not know exactly how much she hit home by reminding me, and I'm sure many others, that all those little things we do are so very important.
I spend every single waking moment consumed by what I need to do for them, what I should've done for them, what I want to do for them, what I can do for them, what I won't do for them... so on so forth.
Those are the things, the "things I do WELL" things, that we have to remember as parents. Not even JUST Moms. We get so caught up in all we don't do well enough, if you know me you this is too often my personal mantra, but we MUST make sure WE ourselves acknowledge all the great things that we do and focus on those.
Man... Dr. Smoot would be proud of that statement. ;) It's something I continually forget. It's something I continually have to remind myself and something he had to drill into my head for 2 years. THIS IS IMPORTANT PEOPLE!!!!!
More important than that, it's important that our families see, realize whatever all THOSE things. Instead of them constantly being disappointed in all the OTHER things we didn't get to or provide for them.
On that note, thanks to this article which I've seen floating around but not read yet, I will feel better about myself as a parent today b/c...
They've got Halloween oreo yogurt in the fridge with fresh bananas for snack after school. They've got shelves LOADED with good books. They've got arms that will hug them tight.
Their beds are currently occupied by Ralph, Bob, Sue, Max, Crocker, Ruff, and... yeah whatever the rest of their names are. I let them talk my ear off even when I wish for silence. I let them survive through using all my bath and hair products for "science experiments". I go w/out facial waxes, pedicures and nights out with the girls so that I can make sure they have movie night with the family and nice clothes and shoes.
I don't beat them, I don't call them names, I don't dump them off on unsuspecting friends and relatives to 'maybe' return later... eventually. I try my hardest to be there for them. I try to teach them good manners, values, common sense and... responsibility. We're working on that last one there. ;)
I can beat myself up better than anyone ever tried, so the moments when it dawns on me that... ya know? I'm actually a pretty decent mom, I feel such immense relief. It only comes along once in awhile, but those days when I realize that I'm not actually horrible at this. I'm simply human and flawlessly imperfect and they love me for it anyway... I feel pretty good.
Hopefully, as time goes on, I'll start to realize that more and more. It's a long road to get there and I remind myself that the people that appear to have it all together and wear a super mom cape under their neatly tailored clothing have nannies and maids or are so drugged up it's probably illegal in a few states.
The fact that I try, the fact that I fail, but I try again and never ever ever EVER give up for them matters more than anything else probably ever can. They probably won't see that for many years to come, but I'll just hold on to the hope that someday they will know that I might have failed at a lot of things, but trying to be the best Mom I could to them won't be one of them.
Where I am not cut out for being the class Mom and the thought of being surrounded by masses of short people with snot, germs, and screechy annoying noises is enough to send me out of state. I am the Mom that lets them dig giant mud tunnels and get covered from head to toe, takes them on photo scavenger hunts in the woods and builds forts out of whatever we can find. Takes them biking through the hills, makes them listen to nature, look at the stars, and helps maintain a pretty intense bug collection.
I accept them for the amazing beings they are. Just like I am supposed to and as time goes on, I learn that I am to expect the same from them and that they already DO accept me as I am. They love me, I am their Mommy. I might be a little too squishy and uncomfortable in my own skin,they could care less.
My lips kiss them goodnight, my arms hug the security right back into them when the world is just a little too much and my chest pillows their heads when they just need to hear the beating sound that lulled them through the very beginning of their existence, reminding them it will always be there for them no matter what.
(P.S. the title, if you don't understand the first part, you have not seen Bedtime Stories and you probably should b/c I think it's cute).
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