I will never learn...

I'm the world's biggest jinx on myself. When was it that I was overcome with idiocy and typed out the words, actually put them in written form so I could not take them back - that I could sleep? That I was no longer suffering from my bouts of insomnia?
It is 3am and here I sit. Unable to sleep for the second night in a row.
*sigh*
Here we go again. This really blows. I was really enjoying getting good sleep. In bed anywhere between 9 and 11pm and up and at em at the butt crack of dawn and feeling just fine. Now I'll be all groggy and grumpy and frumpy. Yay, so much to look forward to. Not to mention my poor kids have to be with me all day long.
Hmmm...no wonder Cody likes to run out the gate so much. That may explain a lot. Ha, okay if he had not recently become the world's largest loudest leech lately, I might be hurt by him running off all the time, but no worries. If you can't find him I'm sure he's just literally under my foot, and I do mean literally, hanging onto my leg and standing on my foot as I try to do things, sitting on me, yelling at me to "come ERE! Mommy!", "Follow ME Mommy!", "MOMMY! Uh-stairs MOMMY!".
Hmmm. He sure is a bossy little turd.
Kade has been scoring some big points lately. We even began a reward system of sorts, but...not to ward off inappropriate behavior, but to reward the really good behavior he'd found all on his own. :)
Helping his baby brother, I've really enjoyed watching this and am getting pretty sneaky at listening and watching their "brother moments" with out me knowing. Surely if they knew that I was aware of what was going on, Kade would bite COdy and COdy would clock Kade upside the head with Thomas the Tank. So I must be on the down low that I know that they are actually nice and helpful.
Not really, he gets a LOT of praise for being nice and helping and sharing etc... it has been happening so much all of a sudden that I've even noticed Cody bypassing me and going to Kade to fix his train for him. Wasn't that a proud moment for me? Yes it was! Especially when Kade did not take the train from Cody and run away with it. Progress folks. It is called progress and what the hell am I DOING?!?!?!?!?!?! Surely jinxing myself yet again.
I should just say the boys are adjusting well and shut up.
I Think I will. I sure won't have the energy for anything else all day tomorrow. UGh.
I will try to go to sleep once again.
Once.
Again.
THis is just so annoying. Really. WHY???? WHy is it SO difficult for any one person to just lay their head down and SIMPLY fall fast asleep? I am often so envious of MIke's ability to do that. Granted, I'm glad that I can actually watch an entire movie without falling asleep most of the time and I can lay in bed and read, surf the net, watch tv etc... and not fall asleep just b/c I'm in bed. Where as, he can't really do that. So yeah I'm glad I don't do that, but when you lay in bed for 2 freakin hours next to someone that no sooner got their head on the pillow that they began snoring, well it's just not FAIR!!!!!
Well, I've gotten a lot of wishful shopping for the house done. Ha. Fat lot of good that is going to do me.
I could utilize this time to finish up some work I began. I shot a few sessions just before we left knowing I was not going to be able to actually proof them until we got here. I've finally gotten started on that, but if I start messing with that stuff very late at night anymore I will be up all night long. I REALLY don't want to do that. I might have to though, sometimes I have to reboot the system so to speak and pull an all nighter so that I can readjust. That used to work like magic, but the last few times I did it, oh like the entire MONTH before we left, it was not really working, and only allowing me to go insane amounts of time with no sleep. Insane, when I say insane, insane enough that I didn't really know it was possible to go so long on so little. I was impressed with myself though for being so functional. HOwever, I guess that is how I ended up in England with one pillow sham that was supposed to go to my sister in law, one shoe that was supposed to be shipped to Matty in Dallas, a clearwire tower that I meant to leave at my sister's so I could beg her to take it in for me (hehe, hi steph!) oh and I even have all of my brother in law's Matrix movies which I very specifically remember putting aside 10 different times so I would NOT forget to leave them at his house.
Right. Had it ALL together about then. For sure.
Oh I just can't bear to be "there" again though. What must one do to go to sleep? I guess if I am feeling a little too awake tomorrow, I'll just hand Mike a frying pan and tell him not to whack me too hard so I'll be sure to wake up when the boys do at least. I'm almost that desperate.
Okay. I said I was going to go try again didn't I?
I should do that. Not to mention...the longer I type, the more idiotic my, whatever you call this, will get.
I will save the world from me right now...and close and take myself to bed...